Day 29 : Music

Music really does move and touch me like nothing else, and I have always found it a lot easier to express myself by listening to and singing with music than with words alone. Because of this, there are MANY songs that I associate with my miscarriages and angels, so I will try to narrow it down to just a few.



And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you one day

I've done everything to move on like I'm supposed to

I'd give anything for one more minute with you

I still miss you

I still miss you baby

Here comes goodbye

Here comes the last time

Here comes the start of every sleepless night

The first of every tear I'm gonna cry

Here comes the pain

Here comes me wishing things had never changed

And she was right here in my arms tonight

But here comes goodbye

Blessings and peace to you,

Leslie

Day 27 : Artwork

When I lost Seth, I found this picture and absolutely love it. I see it in my mind everytime I think of my angels in the arms of Jesus. I know He loves them just as much as I do.

Blessings and peace to you,

Leslie

Day 26 : Their Age

This picture basically says it all. Lost 2 angels at 5 weeks pregnant and one at 8.5 weeks pregnant. Missing them everyday.

Blessings and peace to you,

Leslie

Day 24 : Siblings

I have 5 living children, and 4 of them are Rainbow Babies. My first miscarriage was while we were trying to conceive our second child and had been trying for 9 months already. I was crushed of course to lose a baby, but even more so since we had been actively wanting a child for the previous 9 months only to never be able to say hello. We found ourselves expecting again 9 months later and we had our second living child. Only 3 months postpartum, we found out we were pregnant again! Very unexpected since it took a year and a half to conceive our take home baby. We lost that baby at 8.5 weeks. That very same cycle, however, we conceived again and had our third living child. Our 3rd child was just turning 1 yr old when we found out we were pregnant again! Our joy didn't last long, however, as we lost that baby at 5 weeks pregnant. It was a few more months before we got pregnant again and had our fourth living child. I was very scared when I got pregnant again in November 2011 as my history, as you've seen, seemed to be to have one living child, then one miscarriage, and back and forth. We were very blessed to get through that pregnancy full term and have our fifth living child.

Since our losses were early on in the pregnancy, our children do not really know about our angels. They know that there were babies in mommy's tummy that went straight to heaven, but don't know much more than that. Still, I know that each of my children are watched over by our angels everyday. :)

Blessings and peace to you,

Leslie

Day 23 : Their Name/Their Photo

All 3 of my angels grew wings very early on in pregnancy, so of the 3, I only have a photo of one. The photo I have is of my second angel, Seth, who I lost at 8.5 weeks pregnant. The photo is probably disturbing for most, so I will not post it openly here as I have other pictures, but I will post a link to the picture if you do wish to see him. For the others, I will simply post remembrance pics of their time with me.


Aimee Elizabeth, born to heaven on January 24, 2006 at 5 weeks pregnant
Photo taken by the amazingly talented Carly Marie over at Christian's Beach (Names In The Sand)

Seth Bennett, born to heaven on October 23, 2007 at 8.5 weeks pregnant
Strangely enough, today marks 5 years since I have lost my precious baby. I have only shared his photo with a handful of people, most being early loss moms themselves who just didn't know what to possibly expect.
I have posted my only belly pic I took here as I have very few pictures of his time with me, but here is a link to my precious little Seth's photo. *Must warn you that it may be disturbing for some people. View at your own discretion.*

Lily Dawn, born to heaven on August 11, 2009 at 5 weeks pregnant
Sharing another 'beginning' belly pic here. I like to take a belly picture as soon as I find out I am pregnant to compare to my BIG baby belly later on.

Blessings and peace to you,
Leslie

Day 20 : Charity/Organization

There have been a few organizations that have helped me through the tough times and is of course there during the better times as well.

Angel Baby Inc.

Babies In The Sky

And this FB Page, Angel Pregnancies, was created by a friend after a second trimester loss of her precious son.

Blessings and peace to you,
Leslie

Day 17 : Anniversary/Birth Day/Due Date

Since my losses were so early, I never really focused too much on the Due Date aspect, though I do remember the days when they went to heaven. Most of the time, life goes on as usual with the rest of my children and I get so busy that I don't take the time to remember them in ways that I want to. But, without a doubt, I do remember them, especially on their Angelversaries. Usually it's just spending some time alone and having a good cry. Sometimes that's all you need.

Blessings and peace to you, 

Leslie